Can plumping glaze give you lips like Angelina Jolie?

October 7, 2010

It’s amazing what the power of suggestion can do. You can be cruising along through life and suddenly one day, badabing badaboom!, your entire universe changes based on a suggestion.

Just the other day I was perusing the cosmetics aisle at Target and came across plumping lip glaze by a company called e.l.f. (eyes, lips, face). I’ve never really thought much about the plumpness (or lack thereof) of my lips. Therefore, I wasn’t aware that they needed plumping. But, seeing that there was a product specifically created for this purpose, I started wondering if, perhaps, my lips were a bit flat. Have I been walking around all these years with chicken lips? Do strangers turn away at the hideousness of my pencil thin mouth? How can the big man stand to gaze upon my incredible shrinking lips every day?

Hiding my lips in shame, I immediately proceeded to the checkout counter with my e.l.f. Plum Pout Plumping Lip Glaze. Bring on the Angelina Jolie lips.

e.l.f. Plumping Lip Glaze

In the interest providing marginally scientific results, here’s a rather fuzzy picture of my lips BEFORE the plumping.

Look away! Look away from my hideous, deflated lips!

According to the directions, for best results, I should use the clear gloss first and then the tinted glaze. Hmmm. There’s a bit of a tingle. There’s a party going on right here, a celebration to last throughout the year.

Do they look pouty? Angelina-ish? Can I show my face in public again?

I could probably achieve the same affect if I put Vick’s Vaporub on my lips, but then I’d smell like I was sick and who cares about plump lips when you’re sick?

Maybe I just need a little more gloss.

Yes! Houston, we have lift-off. Still, I'm not sure they are quite there yet.

Odd. The instructions don’t mention that little trick all of us girls know about applying the lip color outside your natural lip line to make lips look fuller. Maybe they just didn’t have room on the package to fit that in.

You think these are plump?

Now THESE are some plump and pouty lips.

We’re practically twins!

Move over Angelina, there’s a new Chick in town.

Chickaliciousness: 2 for the tingle

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{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

Alyson October 7, 2010 at 2:21 pm

Too funny! There are so many plumping products out there. I too have tried some but at the task of having to put too many items on one body part, plumping stick, lip liner, lipstick, gloss. I soon gave up on the whole pouty lip thing. I am glad to see the product comes in a pink color to go along with the rules.

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Unhip Chick October 7, 2010 at 3:33 pm

It’s just too much work trying to be beautiful, isn’t it? Sigh. I think if you hold your mouth exactly right, though, you can achieve the pout naturally. You can also achieve the look by trying to speak French. Those Frenchies have natural pouts.

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Allison October 7, 2010 at 2:31 pm

Love the last photo! I too have been suckered in and bought some plumping stuff. Only used it a few times. It tingled, but that was about it. Maybe I will rescue it today from the unloved cosmetics bag and try it again.

P.S. Google ELF scam!

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Unhip Chick October 7, 2010 at 3:30 pm

Definitely try it again. We’ve got to give Angelinia a run for her money!
Unhip Chick recently posted..Betty Crocker made my day and my dessert

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Joyce October 8, 2010 at 11:58 am

You are totally rocking the Jolie look! Love it! 🙂
Joyce recently posted..She Says- No 3

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